YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

today, finally, i accounted to myself.

from the start of prereg, i never really felt that i was competent.
there were alot of instances, even towards the end, that i felt i wasn't fit to be a pharmacist.
i was afraid of my carelessness, afraid of my lack of knowledge,
afraid that one day i might really kill somebody with my inadequacies.

i still feel so now.
failing mid-viva, has always been a thorn in the flesh.
it is a thorn that is always there, reminding me how i "killed" an imaginary patient, reminding me of how i really was inadequate.
but it is also because of the thorn, that i recognise my inadequacies; i would not have acknowledged them otherwise.
because of the thorn, i strived hard to find ways to improve myself, to shift my priorities, to open my mind, to give myself another chance.
it did add on quite abit of stress, and it took courage to acknowledge and admit the weakness.
but it was worth it. the reflections, the humbled attitude towards learning and reliance, i saw the light today.

and i hope, the light today will not blind me.
after a really tiring 10mths, i hope i became stronger and more ready to accept the challenges ahead!
(:

for now, sleep triumphs! ever since i got 2 days of MC post-viva and slept almost 40hrs of it away, i'm pretty addicted to sleep HAHA. im really ultra sleep deprived, only realised it when i don't feel so prone to nodding off or dozing off when im stoning or doing something boring. now sleep is such a luxury, and the best part is i can enjoy it! well, at least for another 1-2 weeks or so(:

but other than sleep, my favourite activities, here i come:D
im really excited about the 2 weeks im here in SG before i go for 2 more wks to korea:D
can't wait for everything!

+ val-* @ 10:19 PM

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